Here are some my mom came up with:
You know you're a parent when...
...90 seconds at a red light seems like a perfect nap time (for you).
...all furniture is yard sale specials.
...your christmas tree is only decorated from the middle up.
...date night is a blockbuster movie & microwave popcorn.
...you brush your teeth and consider yourself dressed.
...you never go to the bathroom alone again - ever.